Happy Birthday Mike, your first in heaven.

Dear Mike,

I am sitting here this morning with a heavy heart thinking about and missing you on what would have been your 65th birthday.Yesterday when I went on a listing appointment, your voice popped on through the blue tooth connected in my car.  It was from Jamie’s funeral and you were talking about how much Jamie loved animals and how mean Dixie Mae is. I laughed as it was so funny and so typical of you to make people laugh at such a solemn moment.

Then I gulped.

It all came back as you said, “I’m next, no more cutting lines”.

But you weren’t next.

Lilly Bear was next and only a month later.

Then at her Celebration of Life service you again said, “I am next, no more cutting line.”

And you were.

Now you are at your true home with Jamie, and Lillian and the rest of our family that has gone on before us. Do you celebrate your earth birthday in heaven or the day you went home? Silly question for us on earth, huh? But, we will honor you today as we did for the 35 years we were married. I’m baking a cake…your favorite…german chocolate.

I am starting to really understand what the Apostle Paul said in Phil 1:23-24 when he said, “I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account.”

Desire to depart and be with Christ is far better?

Desire in the Greek means a longing, an insatiable lust.

Depart in Greek means to break camp, fold up the tent, pull in the anchor.

Far better in Greek means much, much better, more useful and profitable.

I am quite sure before you and Jamie and Lilly Bear went home that I did not have a longing or insatiable lust to go home. Nor was I ready to break up camp and see dying in Christ as far better or more profitable.

No heaven was just a destination, some place up there, I was going upon my death…nothing I longed or lusted for. Definitely nothing that caused me to want to pull up my tent here for and most definitely nothing I saw as far better.

But when you and Jamie and Lilly departed for home, Christa, Matthew,Andrew-David and I do long for that day when we will all be together again. Why do we have to learn what you told us in your Word the hard way?

We know your death’s are just a temporary interruption and not the sad end of our relationships. We haven’t lost you because we know where you are. Thank you for cheering us on in that great cloud of witnesses.

Paul continued on by saying  until it is our time, it is profitable to be here and to accomplish the purposes God has for us on earth.

Mike, I don’t understand how God is using us here through our great suffering to show His glory but somehow He is.

Thank you Mike for being a mentor to so many here and most of all your family. Your love and grace to all of us helped make us who we are.

My biggest regret was not thanking you and appreciating all the little things you did for me/us here on earth.

I’m learning now that it was the little things you did that make me miss you the most. I get so overwhelmed with all those little things that you simply took in stride. I hope you know now how very much you are missed and loved.

I hold on to scriptures that let’s me know God is Sovereign, that He knew the number of our days before we were even born. That your death, like Jamie and Lillian’s were precious in His sight.

Psalm 139:16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me,when as yet there was none of them.

Psalm 116:15 “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints.”

We’ll see you soon!

I love you,

We love you,

Happy Birthday!

Missy